The flight passengers from hell

Any parent travelling alone with a toddler is bound to understand how stressful it can be, especially during the “terrible twos”.

My daughter is quite literally the sweetest, kindest, most polite, and most accommodating toddler you will ever come across. And this is not an exaggeration coming from a doting parent who wants to take the opportunity to paint their child in a good light. I honestly don't know where my daughter came from sometimes, and anyone who has met her will say the same thing. She loves people, she apologises if she hurts you (even when it's not her fault), and she is extremely appreciative when she is given anything. She, however, like any other child, does have her moments.

Grumpy “witchy” flight neighbour

While my daughter and I were travelling from Norway to Malta the other day, we encountered a less-than-pleasant elderly “couple” (probably in their mid-sixties to seventies). I'll put that in speech marks since I don't know whether they were actually a couple, but it did seem that way.

My daugther was seated on the chair behind the woman — whom it felt like was just waiting for us to make the wrong move. A few times at the very beginning of the flight, my daughter would put her feet on the back of the woman's seat (not enough to cause much disruption, and that is no exaggeration mind you), and I would calmly tell her to put them down “like mommy”.

The woman in the seat in front of my daughter, who appeared to behave more like a witch than an actual human, would frustratedly turn around and stare us down a couple of times. At one point she turned towards my daughter and yelled “Stop” as though I was completely invisible. Frustrated about this, I leaned in and said, “She's only two and a half years old”. I am assuming she wasn't expecting me to speak to her in Norwegian, or perhaps she wasn't expecting me to defend my child, as her eyes appeared to widen at my comeback. She muttered a few inaudible words before turning back.

As my daughter loves to play with booklets, guides, paper, you name it, she busied herself with playing with some of the ones on display on the chair in front of her. This further angered the woman in front of us, as she turned around yet again and muttered something inaudible.

Anyone who knows me knows that I do not pick fights and I don't look for trouble, but you DO NOT come for my child, most especially when she hasn't done anything wrong because I will quite literally obliterate you!

She was playing with booklets as calmly as possible and that was an issue too, apparently. 🙄

Having had enough of the grumpy old hag turning around in frustration, I told her, “Come on, she is 2 years, for crying out loud! If you're having such an issue with my daughter, just switch seats. There's even a seat empty here on the outer aisle on our row.”

She responded with something along the lines of not wanting to be caught dead sitting next to us (fair enough). I completely ignored that, of course, and eventually the couple was able to move seats to the aisle right across from us.

I kid you not, for the rest of the flight, the woman kept staring over at us, watching my daughter like a hawk. I could see her clearly in my peripheral view. At some point, she even had the nerve to complain to another passenger who stopped by to speak to her — I am assuming they may have been travelling with the grumpy old couple, or perhaps they knew the couple from somewhere — about my daughter.

It's quite outrageous to me that after all that commotion, and eventually even switching seats, that the woman still wanted to be in our business. Some people just don't want to choose happiness. Ugh. Sorry to say, if they are anyone's grandparents, I feel quite sorry for those grandkids. What a predicament to land oneself in.

Mr. and Mrs. Grumpy 🙄

At long last, after reaching Malta, and being thankful that the travel sickness tablets worked on my daughter, I waited for all the passengers to alight before hurrying out of the plane with my daughter in tow.

Entering the full baggage claim area, I began to scan the hall for my daughter's stroller. Thankfully, it didn't take long to find it, or our luggage for that matter, so I bent down and got to work on it. (it's usually quite a struggle to fold the stroller back up after a flight because the flight staff usually press it down further to make it flatter. I absolutely hate that!)

It is while I was turned away from my daughter, not realising that she had grabbed a part of the stroller and was waving it around, that the grumpy couple from earlier decided to utter their disdain.

The woman looked absolutely terrified that my daughter might injure her with that little thing she was holding onto and hurried out of the way, her eyes wide. The man, on the other hand, thought it was the perfect time to tell my daughter, “Now that's quite enough”, and they both hurried off towards the exit. Of course, his words made me realise that my daughter had the small object that belonged to her stroller, so I quickly grabbed it from her and looked up to see them hurrying off. “Skjerp dere” (get real), I called after them before returning to struggling with my daughter's stroller.

Compassion is dead

After becoming a mother, I realised just how much a toddler being a toddler tends to negatively affect parents when it comes to how the world perceives them. You quite simply CANNOT CATCH A BREAK!

If your toddler is crying, people will stare at you as though it is your fault they are crying — and on rare occasions, it may very well be — not thinking about the fact that it is completely normal for a child who doesn't yet know how to communicate perfectly to have meltdowns. Even adults have meltdowns, for crying out loud, and many of them know perfectly well how to communicate properly.

I feel so grateful when I bump into other mothers/fathers who show compassion. Like the woman at the airport whose daughter offered to give mine a cute, furry toy with doe eyes, as my daughter was crying frantically because she was tired and hungry. I told the adorable little girl that we couldn't possibly accept it, but she insisted, assuring me that she had plenty more in her collection.

Grateful for the break, and the fact that the toy had made my daughter stop crying, I thanked her. When I looked up, her mother nodded in solidarity, telling me that she understood and that she herself had two children, and that it wasn't always easy.

Unfortunately, this type of compassion doesn't usually extend to the wider population. I see most people have very little tolerance for children, more so children on the autism spectrum, and it bothers me — a lot! And don't even get me started on people who watch you struggle but never stop to ask if you need help.

Ignorance at its finest

Most people act as though they are the most intelligent people you will ever come across, yet, toddler behaviour — the fact that some toddlers will cry at any point in time, or find it hard to sit still on most occasions — completely eludes them.

The most baffling thing of all is that many of the people who fit under the umbrella of individuals who are ignorant towards toddlers have actually raised children themselves. Omg, I need need to sit down for this!

Yes, I understand that listening to an inconsolable toddler can be extremely difficult at times, but when did it ever become a parent's fault that they are unable to soothe their crying child if they have tried quite literally EVERYTHING to stop them from crying? When did it become a crime for a toddler to be a toddler and act on toddler emotions? As a mother, I can guarantee you that there is not a time when I do not scold my daughter if she does something wrong — or discipline her when she's been naughty (she absolutely hates being put in a chair if she's been naughty), but reinforcement has made her realise what she needs to do to avoid being put there. However, it wouldn't hurt for people to be more considerate of others — to have compassion.

Lessons learned along the way

Becoming a mother has taught me the struggles of being a parent, but most importantly, the struggles linked to being a woman. What irks me the most is people claiming to understand but in the same breath turn around and do something that points to the opposite. It wouldn't kill to have compassion. It wouldn't kill to be more understanding. It wouldn't kill to extend a helping hand where possible. We can do better. As for my daughter and I, we will keep travelling in good spirits!